1. Because there's no Web site listed on the can.
2. Because the can's color scheme and logo haven't changed since before I was born.
3. Because the logo is a lion-shaped crest, the spokesman is a cartoon bear, and I don't know what either one signifies.
4. Because it's union made.
5. Because until last week, I didn't realize it was still in production.
6. Because the flavor is so weak, even the PBR-swilling hipsters won't touch it.
7. Because it's made in the land of sky-blue waters.