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Pig Candy

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Imagine if some trickster, like the hacker group Anonymous or Bam Margera, set out to undermine the bacon fad by creating the most gratuitously bacon-y substance possible—a culinary creation so porcine it would turn all but the most ardent pork lover off pig flesh forever.

That substance has (maybe) arrived, and its name is Pig Candy.

Created by Jackson, Wyo.-based Cafe Genevieve, which strives to "bring the South to your mouth," Pig Candy is thick-cut Applewood smoked bacon slow cooked in salt, pepper, mustard powder, two kinds of sugar and cayenne pepper. This stuff doesn't come with nutritional information on the package, so there's no telling how much damage it can do to one's cardiovascular system or pancreas, but consumption is recommended in small doses.

One slice tastes divine, two slabs taste like shavings off Donald Trump's love handles and three feel like they might put you in a pine box so, whatever you do, don't pig out.

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