"Mr. President, once again, I thank you for this awesome honor and responsibility. I'm ready to serve the people of the United States."
--Newly appointed (but not yet confirmed) Secretary of the Interior Dirk Kempthorne, wrapping up his acceptance speech in Washington, D.C. But the syntactical resemblance to the Poop Joke of the Week is just too striking to ignore ... Could it be that Dirk, long known around Boise for his inability to manage his personal finances, has had to moonlight as a latte-jockey to afford a ticket to his own acceptance speech? Or maybe he's just innocently playing the "Bill" to George W. Bush's "Ted." All we know is things looked a lot more promising for America's wild places back when Wayne Clinton and his trusty sidekick Garth were in charge.