Opinion » Minerva's Breakdown

Minerva's Breakdown

Advice for those on the verge

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Dear Minerva,

How do you seduce a man?

—Curious and Lonely

Dear Curious and Lonely,

How to Seduce a Man by Minerva Jayne

Step 1: Get up and get ready for your day. Wear whatever clothes you love. Wear your hair however you like. Put on makeup. Or not. It's your face.

Step 2: Pursue your passions. Paint if you like to paint. Go to yoga class if you like. Watch Maury if you prefer. Want to save the world? Get your sweet ass out there and do it.

Step 3: Love your body. All of it. Even the parts others might hate. Especially the parts that men think they have a right to an opinion of. It's your vessel. Cover it in tattoos if you like. Keep it bare if you like. Want plastic surgery? Get it, babe, but it must be you wanting it, not someone else's expectation. If I had the money I would be getting the Heidi Montag special right stat.

Step 4: Be authentic.

Step 5: Don't. Seduction is the dishonest way and suggests manipulation and trickery. In 2016 you don't want to be stuck in the position, or any of the positions the Kama Sutra outlines, where things are not aboveboard. The best way to attract a man is to be yourself (see steps 1-4).