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Machete and Piranha 3D. Got Blood?

Hey, isn't that Robert DeNiro?



No doubt, Machete will someday be the answer in an experts-only movie trivia contest. Name a movie that co-stars Lindsay Lohan, Cheech Marin, Steven Seagal and Robert DeNiro. Yup. This is the one. Machete started out as a joke. It was a faux-trailer attached to Robert Rodriguez's 2007 release Grindhouse. But it generated enough buzz that Rodriguez got the green light to stretch the joke out to 105 minutes of strong violence, nudity and all around tastelessness. It's a big profane cartoon. Hard to believe, but the DVD is being marketed as a more violent director's cut.

Piranha 3D

Name the movie in which a razor-toothed monster threatens a tranquil beach town. Hint: It co-stars Richard Dreyfuss. That's right, it's Piranha 3D! (Silly you. You thought it was Jaws?) Dreyfuss abandoned all shame to appear in this horror (and we don't mean horribly good) film. Director Alexandre Aja (The Hills Have Eyes) surrendered his thriller-cred with this wet piece of drivel. Jerry O'Connell and Elizabeth Shue co-star. Here's a decent drinking game: Do a shot each time someone goes topless or legless (or both). You'll be sauced in the first half-hour.