I was recently heading back from a bachelorette party in Mexico and was stuck in the airport for over 6 hours. I was living my best life—hungover, 4-day-old hair, hobo chic attire and last night's makeup. All the girls were asleep, looking for last-minute souvenirs or listening to their headphones. Unfortunately for me, I was spiraling in my head with my own thoughts.
As a single girl I know you understand what I'm talking about. I was creepily watching and judging everyone I saw and then evaluating my life. For example, I was shooting daggers at all the happy couples and then coming up with their flaws. I'm cuter than her, I bet he's unemployed and she's settling. Or he looks too old for her, she must have daddy issues. I knew I had to stop so I just focused on my phone to drown out everything else. Bad idea.
First, looking at my phone meant reliving the fun trip I'd had and scrolling through all the pictures of margaritas, smiling friends and beach selfies. However, that quickly turned into looking at old pictures of myself—a thinner, younger version of myself—occasionally accompanied by a picture of happier times with a former flame. I started analyzing every picture and trying to pinpoint at what moment I started gaining weight and dating men not worth my time.
If any of my friends shared this moment of desperation with me I'd tell them to snap out of it and reassure them with kind words and a motivational quote I'd stolen off Instagram. So why was I just letting myself spiral? Luckily I sought a lifeline, started talking to a girlfriend and came back to reality before I'd done too much damage.
Why are we so hard on ourselves, but so supportive of our friends? Why do we instantly go to "I'm going to die alone instead I just haven't met the one?" Have you been there? What helps you out of the darkness? Cheers to focusing on the positive not dwelling on the negative.
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