rude people

Monday, December 15, 2014

Mr. Cope’s Cave: That’s Not Who We Are?… Bull!

Posted By on Mon, Dec 15, 2014 at 10:07 AM

You know I am not one to criticize our president. Not this one, anyway. That’s not to say I absolutely adore every last thing he does. It’s not to say I don’t often wish he would go further than he wants to go on certain matters, or that I’d prefer he wouldn’t go at all into other matters.

But I refuse to use any significant portion of my tiny forum here to bitch about Obama’s alleged shortcomings or over-reaches. There has not been a figure in my lifetime who’s been bitched about any more than him already, and I figure at least nine-tenths of it has been unjust and unjustified. Besides, I am confident that any shortcomings he may have are still miles and miles beyond those of his constant critics, and that any over-reaching he’s done most likely didn’t reach far enough.

However, there is one thing he says, and has said repeatedly, that drives me nuts: That’s not who we are. If my memory serves me, at some point during several recent crises of national conscience—whether it be the tsunami of terrified Central American kids crossing the southern border last summer, the rash of teenage blacks being cut down by men they should be putting their trust in or the release of the intelligence report last week exposing Bush’s CIA as a hellhouse of lies and torture—Obama appealed to the decency of Americans by reminding us That’s not who we are.

No, President Obama. That’s not who you are.

Which is precisely why I have such admiration and respect for him. His intrinsic moral nature comes through like a warm spring day, just as his predecessor’s essentially immoral nature is as evident as the vacant smirk on his face.

And when he says it—That’s not who we are—he is partially right about the rest of us. Cruelty, mockery, brutality, racism, the lust to cause others pain, the indifference to others' pain—all those stains on the human soul that lead to such torture and death and violent decadence—that’s not who most of us are. Most of the time, at least.

And even in those times when we fall under the spell of those baser instincts, most of us would rather not feel those things. Most of us want to be kind and generous, forgiving and tolerant—moral—even under the most difficult of circumstances.

Then there are those who pretend to be kind and generous, forgiving and tolerant, using the pretense for any number of purposes, but usually to benefit themselves in some way.

However, there are also those—and they seem to be increasing—who don’t even pretend to be moral beings. Who exult in their indifference to the pain of others. Who mock those who aren’t as cruel as themselves. Who revel in a new-found freedom to be as vicious as only a withered soul could allow.

They infest the chat rooms and comment sections of the Internet, spitting their venom in ways most of us find revolting. Their notion of what’s funny are things like gun range targets printed with images of Trayvon Martin and Michael Brown, and photos of drunken teenage girls left lying naked and violated on the floor. They attack victims for their vulnerability, the bereaved for their softness, the weakened because they can.

They don’t care whether or not torture is an effective intelligence gathering tool; it’s enough for them to know that a Muslim is being tortured. They don’t care that a death row inmate might be innocent; it’s enough for them to know a black man is going to die. They don’t care that a coed claims she has been raped; it gives them another reason to hate women.

They have no friends… only sympathizers—other misanthropes who are not as repulsed by rape, by racism, by injustice and torture as most of us are. They have no use for kindness and hold no hopes for a better world; they would welcome the chaos of “everyone for themselves.” They contribute nothing to the human family other than their vileness, their puerility, their deviancy. They are barbarians, their innate incivility set free by an uncivil ideology and the example of that ideology’s most vocal proponents.

You know the one I’m talking about.

They are the least of us, and the loudest of us. If they prevail and do become what America is all about, America won’t be worth saving.

Now, here’s today’s damn Xmas music.

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Monday, September 15, 2014

Mr. Cope’s Cave: Do You Know Who I Am!

Posted By on Mon, Sep 15, 2014 at 10:25 AM

What is that really saying?… Do you know who I am? 

Oh, there are circumstances, I suppose, when it’s an innocent enough question. Excuse me, sir, but I have amnesia and can’t remember my name. Do you happen to know who I am?

Or at the 50-year class reunion, with that grandmother who was your frog-dissecting partner in old Mr. Beeker’s sophomore biology class, but haven’t seen since graduation. No fair looking at the nametag, now. Do you know who I am?

But that’s not how we usually hear it, is it? The usual way we hear “Do you know who I am?” is when someone who considers themselves to be quite the somebody—an eminence so grand that the receiver of the question sure as hell should know who he, or she, is.

Furthermore, that grand eminence wouldn’t be saying it if he (or she) wasn’t in a situation where he (or she) didn’t feel he (or she) was getting the proper respect, the proper deference, perhaps the proper acquiescence or submission from another individual.

By some accounts, the line was the first thing out of Larry Craig’s mouth when he got caught by a vice cop soliciting companionship in an airport men’s room. And I have a friend—a Republican friend, I should add—who says he witnessed at close range Jim Risch, when told he had to pay for the gas he needed inside the convenience store because of the late hour, demanded of the poor clerk over the intercom, “Do you know who I am?” (And that was before he had even become an accidental governor for a few months, or a do-nothing senator for six years.)

The question—which I think we should always consider a rhetorical one, as it’s hardly ever asked without the implication that whoever is being asked it isn’t worth waiting for an answer from—made news twice last week. Maybe you didn’t hear the one about George Zimmerman (the man-sized slug who murdered Trayvon Martin and got away with it) saying the line to a workmate in an argument that included a threat from Zimmerman to kill the other guy. But surely you heard about Sarah Palin saying it during what sounded like a Hatfields/McCoys outbreak up in Wasilla. And Sarah’s incident, during which her cheesiness was on vivid display, came in the same week she made an ass out of herself yet again in a statement—unsolicited by anyone, that I’m aware of—in which she, in a nut shell, suggested that the world would be so much better off if the McCain/Palin administration was dealing with current international crises instead of you-know-who.

Yeah, right… Bobblehead and Bimbo take on the world.
I’m not surprised that Wasilla Sarah would say it. I suspect it’s not the first time. (A Palin spokesperson has claimed that’s not what she said. But when having to decide who is lying in a he-said/she-said dispute, I tend to go with the one who has the most to lose, and I can’t imagine Ms. Palin wanting her public image to fade any more than it already has.) Nor does it shock to hear that George Zimmerman is stupid enough to say it. He’ll probably be saying it for the rest of his grubby little life.

I also believe my friend about Risch saying it because he didn’t get the proper acknowledgement from some lowly clerk, and of course I believe the Minneapolis cop who was treated to Larry Craig’s rendition of it. But I hadn’t thought about Li’l Jimmy Risch using it for years, or Craig, either. Either of them saying “Do you know who I am?” seems as likely and natural as hearing a rooster crow.

It was the Palin/Zimmerman eruption that got me to considering what sort of an incredibly arrogant asshole would resort to an argument that relied solely on who they are—as in “I’m Sarah Palin, and that’s all you need to know, buster!”

And does it also not speak to an almost incomprehensible lack of character?… so often coming, as it does, from the sneering lips of those whose eminence has been established by questioning the character of others.

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Monday, July 7, 2014

Mr. Cope’s Cave: More Spiritual Putrescence (From the People Who Brought Us 'Duck Dynasty' and Professional Wrestling)

Posted By on Mon, Jul 7, 2014 at 9:37 AM

You seem pensive today, Mr. Cope. Sad, even. Is something troubling you?

Sorta, yeah.

Care to tell me about it?

Oh, it’s just a thing I learned about today. A dumb new thing some hillbillies have taken up, I guess because they don’t feel like they’ve done enough damage to the human soul already. And it’s gotten me to wondering if there’s is a limit to how low and rotten and squalid people can get.

Ah, you must be referring to the crowds of people screaming at the buses of illegal children in California.

No, actually not. I mean, yeah… that’s low and rotten and squalid, for sure. But it’s just the sort of behavior I’ve come to expect from about a third of this country anymore. You know, really, racism, cruelty, xenophobia, selfishness, hatred, the continual threat of violence… those aren’t anything new. In fact, they have their own political party, in case you haven’t been paying attention.

No, this new thing I just heard about… well, I won’t say it’s worse than that. But it is so outrageous and stupid and thoughtless and malevolent and… Gad, I’m running out of words to express how… how absolutely shitty it is! However you describe it, though, it seriously has me wondering if the human race deserves to exist. If this universe wouldn’t be better off if eboli or chicken flu or something just wiped us off the face of the Earth once and for all.

Wow. It must be something pretty horrible. So are you going to tell me about it?

Have you ever heard of “rolling coal?” It’s where some subhuman puke jiggers with his diesel pickup so that it can produce a huge, thick cloud of black, sooty, filthy exhaust with the flick of a switch. Then they’ll go out and spew it on bicyclists and joggers and other cars sitting at a red light or stuck in traffic just for the fun of it. Some of these… these…


Yeah. Vermin. Some of these vermin actually film themselves doing it, and laughing about it as they drive away, leaving a poor pedestrian or biker choking on the fumes. Look it up. It’ll make you sick.

“Rolling coal?”

Yeah. Rolling coal.

How do you explain it?

I don’t think I can. It’s too… too…


Yeah. Unthinkable.
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Thursday, February 16, 2012

Idaho at Risk for Unwanted Piggyback Rides

Posted By on Thu, Feb 16, 2012 at 3:00 PM

Idahoans should be on high alert for 28-year-old Sherwin Shayegan, better known as "The Piggyback Bandit."

From AP:

He has become known for ingratiating himself with high school teams—usually basketball—and then hoisting his 240 pounds onto the backs of the student athletes for piggyback rides.

He's left a trail of befuddled athletes in his wake.

That's right. This vile villain shows up at high school sporting events, cheers, ingratiates himself to the team and then once they are victorious, hurls all 240 pounds of his corpulent posterior onto their backs for an unsolicited ride. This behavior has gotten him arrested multiple times and banned from high school sporting events in five states.

Which five states? North Dakota and Minnesota are on the list. But so are Oregon, Washington and Montana, which leaves Idaho ripe for the riding. Gadzooks!

Also from AP:

In October, Shayegan was arrested in Helena, Mont., for jumping on two unsuspecting high school soccer players during a state tournament. Montana high school officials are worried his actions will hurt someone.

Police believe Shayegan may have gone back to western Washington, where he has 16 convictions dating back to 2004 that include criminal trespass, vehicle prowling and resisting arrest.

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Wednesday, December 28, 2011

RIAA Pirates TV Shows, Passes the Blame

Posted By on Wed, Dec 28, 2011 at 6:00 AM

  • Via Wikimedia Commons

The Recording Industry Association of America is spending the holiday season wiping the egg off its face. It was recently discovered that the trade group—known for bringing massive lawsuits against individuals who pirate copyrighted music—has been doing a bit of pirating itself.

The website YouHaveDownloaded allows users to search IP addresses to see who, or what, is illegally downloading copyrighted materials. A search conducted by revealed that the RIAA has illegally downloaded various movies, TV shows and software—up to $9 million worth.

Over the years, the RIAA has sued roughly 20,000 individuals for downloading music online. The group is generally unmerciful, vying for tough penalties that often bankrupt file-sharers in order to make an example out of them.

So what’s the RIAA’s excuse for engaging in the same activities it ruthlessly attempts to suppress? The organization claims that a third-party accessed the company’s IP addresses, and then downloaded the materials.

Hopefully the irony isn’t lost on them. This is likely the same defense that most of the 20,000 defendants the RIAA has prosecuted claimed.

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Thursday, November 3, 2011

Seattle 'Superhero' Loses Job With Children After Arrest

Posted By on Thu, Nov 3, 2011 at 3:20 PM

Phoenix Jones, the self-appointed, not-so-super protector of Seattle, Wash., may soon find himself in the super soup line. The costumed vigilante lost his job working with disabled children this week as part of the fallout over an incident in which he was arrested for assault after pepper-spraying a group of revelers in downtown Seattle. Jones claimed he was breaking up a fight, but the revelers told police he attacked them unprovoked.

From an article in

Jones says that because of his arrest, he’s on “a list” that prohibits him from working with children, because he has “a history of interjecting myself into situations that are dangerous.”

Jones, naturally, disputes that characterization. “I would say I have a history of fighting crime,” he says. “The whole point of what I do is to keep people safe.”

Jones isn’t sure how he’ll pay the bills now. He says he’s received offers for fight bouts from the Strikeforce mixed martial arts organization, and plans to start fighting crime in the daytime, in addition to his night patrols around Seattle. Other than that, he says, “I really don’t know.”

[ Video is no longer available. ]

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Friday, October 21, 2011

Wear a Helmet: Today Marks the Rescheduled Rapture

Posted By on Fri, Oct 21, 2011 at 12:00 PM

Just a quick reminder to everyone: After world-class asshat Harold Camping was dead wrong about the world ending in May, he amended his previous statements to say that the end of world would be five months from then, Friday, Oct. 21.

Which is today, to be exact.

Any believers out there might want to wear a helmet today to protect against fireballs from the sky.

But perhaps the latest William Shatner music video, in which he plays an animated face in the stars breathing fireballs down on Earth, is actually what Camping predicted. If so, someone get that man a cigar. But it's more likely Camping is just preying on people's fears to cash in.

Only tomorrow—or the lack therof—will tell.

[ Video is no longer available. ]

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Monday, August 17, 2009

The Camper's Book of Etiquette

Posted By on Mon, Aug 17, 2009 at 3:29 PM

Here’s something to consider: A camper’s book of etiquette.

Rule No. 1: When heading out to do some primitive camping (that’s camping not in a campground), don’t set up camp right next to someone else. People who grab their tents and head out into the boondocks usually want to get away from other people. Idaho has a lot of public land, there’s plenty of room for all of us.

Rule No. 2: If your favorite campsite is already filled by the time you get there at 8 p.m. on a Friday night, don’t sit at the entry road to the camp and loudly complain that you don’t know how someone else could possibly be camped there because it’s always wide open. Obviously, it’s not, so move on.

Rule No. 3: If you want to scream and yell and blast your radio at all hours of the night, make sure you’re far away from anyone else, or consider just staying home.

Rule No. 4: On the list of campfire-acceptable instruments, trumpets and bugles fall somewhere near the very bottom along with snare drums, cymbals and those 1980s keyboard guitar things (on principle if nothing else).
Never, ever should you pull out your trusty trumpet and start tooting randomly in the night. Those things are loud—that’s why the army used them to call orders in the din of battle. Never, never should you use said trumpet to play “Taps” in the middle of the night, and never, even under threat of painful and humiliating death, should you ever play “Revelry” at the crack of dawn unless you are at a government-sanctioned military boot camp.
If you really need to tap into your musical soul while in the wilderness, try a harmonica or the time-tested acoustic guitar to lead a round of “Kumbaya.”

No. 5: When breaking camp, clean up after yourself. Don’t leave plastic bottles, tin cans, full bags of trash or your bent tent stakes behind. And most importantly, don’t leave your used underwear half buried near camp. That’s just gross.

Got more suggestions for the Camper’s Book of Etiquette? Let’s hear them.

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Wednesday, December 10, 2008

World of incongruency

Posted By on Wed, Dec 10, 2008 at 8:29 PM

I am at the gym for a spin class. The woman in front of me turns around and says, "Are you sick? Because if you are, I think I don't want to sit next to you." So this is the deal.
I had coughed slightly since entering the room. For whatever reason- damn, do I need to explain why the hell I was coughing! I had a slight cough. I was totally nonchalant and replied, "No, I am not sick. I just have allergies or something." What I really wish I had said was, "You move because I do not want you sitting next to me!". What a bitch! Really lady, stay home!

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