Mr. Cope’s Cave: All Stuffed Up Until Next Year


So what’d you get for Christmas, Mr. Cope?

Oh, you know. Stuff. More stuff.

You mean like iPhones and iPads and stuff like that?

Nope. No phone I app pad stuff. That’s not the kind of stuff I have much interest in, Junior.

So was it Xbox video game type stuff? Or maybe World of Car Theft hi-def Wii Play Fire Stick Station kind of stuff?

Nah. None of that. Whatever it is.

Then it must be home theater stuff. All-around TiVo sound bar Bose wave player Hulu stuff and Blue Netflix Ray player streaming stuff.

Uh, no. I don’t think there was any of that stuff there. Not that I could tell, anyway.

Well, let’s see. What’s left? Oh! I’ll bet it was rough-and-tough stuff. That camo-coated compound hunting bow stuff and Cabela’s battery-powered fisherman’s foot warmers and survival-tested thermal underwear stuff with Duck Dynasty pictures on the front. Or was it Bronco stuff? Blue turf sweatpants and orange Fiesta coffee Bowl stuff with pennants to flap-flap from you car on game days?

Uh-uh. Nope. I’d of known if I got any of that stuff.

Then it had to be shredder stuff. Ski gear and polarized goggles with coordinated cross-country boot binding lightweight all-weather avalanche alert stuff with “Bogus” written on the side.

Scooter, do I look like someone who’s ever been on a snowboard?

Well… no. But Mr. Cope, I’m running out of ideas here. You don’t mean you just got socks and shirts and stuff like that, do you?

Nah. Already have all the socks I’ll ever need. And I have enough shirts to last a couple more life times.

Hey, you didn’t get a drone, did you? Or a new car? That’s it isn’t it? You got a new car! Or a drone, maybe.

Skippy, if I’d gotten a new car, you would have seen it in the driveway. And a drone would be fun, maybe, but I have a feeling I’d be done playing with it about the time the batteries died.

Well darnit, I give up then.


And you’re not going to tell me what kind of stuff you got for Christmas, are you?


Do you want to hear what I got for Christmas?


So I don’t suppose you’ll be telling me what you’re doing on New Year's Eve, either.

Sure, I’ll tell you. What is it you want to know?

What you’re doing on New Year's Eve.

Oh, you know. Stuff.