I have a phobia about dying in a walk-in freezer. The fear comes from watching Short Circuit 2 way too many times as a kid. The scene where they are cracking open the fortune cookies in a freezer surrounded by frozen Peking ducks scares the hell out of me. The poorly lit, cold and plain eerie atmosphere of a freezer has always given me the creeps.
My phobia has been compounded lately by the death of a world class chef. Chef Jean-Francois Poinard, 71, was found dead in his girlfriend's freezer. I guess he didn’t die from being in the freezer; the girlfriend said she killed him with a punch to the face. Still, no matter how the death happened, the thought of being in a freezer is morbid.
The girlfriend, Guylene Collober, 51, admitted that she killed him, tossed him in the bathroom for a few days and then bought a chest freezer to store him in. Chef Poinard has been missing for the past two years, according to authorities. Why no one ever bothered to look in the giant chest freezer in his abusive girlfriend's tiny Paris apartment is beyond me.
The rigid life that Poinard lived as one of the best French chefs is now completely overshadowed by the rigid death that he suffered. Note to self: get rid of the chest freezer.
Randy King is a local chef and wants his head frozen when he dies. Click to follow Randy on Facebook.