I Want My Trash Cans


As ridiculous as it might seem, I was actually pretty excited for the delivery of my new trash cans yesterday.

A colorful flier had been stuck to my doorknob the week before, informing me of the impending arrival of my fancy new trash and recycling cans. So, it was with great anticipation that I turned onto my street yesterday evening only to find a great void on the sidewalk.

I stood there, looking a little confused, taking stock of my neighbors’ brand-new, non-trash-splattered cans sitting in front of their homes. “What about me?” I wondered aloud, suddenly feeling like I was back in high school and the butt of some prank.

Disappointed, and with nowhere to put my recycling, I called Allied Waste this morning to inquire why I seemed to be singled out. Turns out, I’m a victim of my own desire not to be wasteful.

Since I made a special request for cans smaller than the average 95-gallon size, I’m just going to have to wait.

The helpful customer service agent said the smaller can sizes are being delivered on a separate truck, and crews are already falling behind despite only starting to drop them off a week ago.

Delivery for the 48-gallon cans is now running roughly four days behind schedule, and arrival of the 65-gallon versions is delayed by several days.

I’ve been assured my new blue and gray cans will show up soon, but I’m still feeling a bit like the only kid not invited to the party.