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LIFE ISN'T CHEAP • LOOK INTO MY EYES YOU ARE GETTING STUPID • BE NICE TO YOUR SLAVES (AT LEAST IN PUBLIC) • BUT CAN YOU VALIDATE MY PARKING? • WHY DO ALL GOOD THINGS COME TO AN END? • HOW TO WIN

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LIFE ISN'T CHEAP

If you'd like to start a new life in Australia, there's a guy in Perth who is planning to put his entire life up for auction starting on June 22. After a painful breakup with his wife, Ian Usher, 44, re-evaluated his life and decided he had had enough. Now his entire life—including his house, car, job and friends—will be sold to the highest bidder. "On the day it's all sold and settled, I intend to walk out of my front door with my wallet in one pocket and my passport in the other, nothing else at all," Usher claims. "My current thoughts are to then head to the airport, and ask at the flight desk where the next flight with an available seat goes to, and to get on that and see where life takes me from there." Usher expects the winning bid to be around $400,000 (the value of his house), a price that will include a one-time introduction to his friends and a two-week trial run at his job. Bidding starts at noon, Perth time, on June 22 and will be open for one week. Get all the details at ALife4Sale.com.

LOOK INTO MY EYES—YOU ARE GETTING STUPID

Italian police are searching for a man who seems to be hypnotizing and robbing supermarket cashiers. Last week, they released surveillance video footage (look it up on YouTube) that shows the man bending over toward the cashier, talking to her for a few moments, and then convincing her to hand over a cool thousand bucks. In every case, according to police reports, the last thing the cashiers remember is a man leaning over and saying "Look into my eyes," at which point their memory of the incident disappears. (The Daily Mail)

BE NICE TO YOUR SLAVES (AT LEAST IN PUBLIC)

Two teenage Bulgarian sisters were rescued last week from an Italian circus where they were held as slaves and forced to perform bizarre stunts such as swimming with piranhas and having live snakes thrown at them. An audience member finally tipped off police to the suspicious behavior after watching one of the girls trying to escape from the piranha tank but having her head held down in the water and seeing the other girl being bitten by snakes. The three Italian men who ran the circus now face charges of human slavery and various other breaches of international human rights conventions. (The Guardian)

BUT CAN YOU VALIDATE MY PARKING?

Last week some dude found what he calls the best business card in the world between the pages of a used book he bought recently. Hit up MattCutts.com/blog/the-best-business-card-ever to check out a scan of the business card of one W. W. Green, purveyor of such diverse items as used cars, land, whiskey, manure, fly swatters and bongos. The card goes on to list other unusual services, such as wars fought, tigers tamed, bars emptied, uprisings quelled and orgies organized.

WHY DO ALL GOOD THINGS COME TO AN END?

If you're old enough to remember that last third of the 20th century, you'll probably enjoy an article in the Washington Post called "Left Behind," about things from our recent past that are obsolete or well on their way to obsolescence. The top 10 include blind dates, mix tapes, land lines, short basketball shorts, phone sex and getting lost. They also published a list of another 170 on their way out, including electric typewriters, record stores, the yellow pages, lickable stamps, smoking while pregnant, photo albums, hitchhiking and men with one earring. Go stroll down nostalgia lane at WashingtonPost.com.

HOW TO WIN A PRIZE IN LITERATURE WITHOUT REALLY TRYING

A few weeks ago, I sent you off to vote for 2007's weirdest book title at TheBookseller.com. Well, the results are in, and our winner this year is If you Want Closure in Your Relationship, Start With Your Legs, with 33 percent of the vote. Runners-up were I Was Tortured By the Pygmy Love Queen and Cheese Problems Solved. Past winners of this award include such classics as Joy of Chickens (1980), Living With Crazy Buttocks (2002), Bombproof Your Horse (2004) and Lesbian Sadomasochism Safety Manual (1990).

I-READ-IT-ON-THE-INTERNET-SO-IT-MUST-BE-TRUE FACT OF THE WEEK

Only 36 percent of people believe that official statistics released by the government are accurate.

Get way more bizarro news at CuriousTimes.com.

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