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If Only She Had Shed Her Skin At The Crime Scene

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This man is not a police officer. He's not the lovechild of Bob's Big Boy and the X-Men's Wolverine. He's simply a 33-year-old man who misses his pet snake. No, really.

According to news reports in Eastern Idaho, the herpephile pictured here, Gabe Valentino, has been charged with a felony count of impersonating a police officer. He allegedly called a woman whom he suspected had stolen his 3-foot python, said he was an officer with Idaho Falls Police Department and told the woman that she was his primary suspect. Valentino's suspect responded by calling the real police. She told reporter Suzanne Hobbs that she knew the voice was Valentino's both because of his accusatory tone and because he used the snake's name, "Sintris." In another interview, Valentino said that he is still offering $300 to anyone who can bring Sintris home.

He really wants to find that snake.

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