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Dear Minerva,

I've been seeing this guy regularly. We click but I think of him as more of a "friend with benefits" (FWB). We're not exclusive and can see other people. I'm feeling guilty because I have just spent the night with an amazing man. I need to tell my regular FWB about it but I know he'll freak out. I wasn't planning on hanging out with this guy tonight but he was insistent and pursued me hard. His amazing personality and kind soul make it harder. He and I connected on a very different spiritual and emotional level and I can see him being more than a FWB. How and when do I tell him about this new one and should I feel this guilty?

—Twitterpated

Dear Twitterpated,

"Friends with benefits" is such a modern convenience but, from the sounds of it, you feel some sort of loyalty to your FWB. You already feel the need to tell him about what you've done, but is it fair to burden him with your guilt? While this new man could be "the one," don't let your one night with him overtake your imagination. Chemistry is undeniable, but one night does not the romance of the century make. Get to know him better. If you truly have no strings attached, it would be cruel to talk about it with your FWB unless that's part of the arrangement. No one needs to hear about the newer, shinier model until you're breaking it off.

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