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Curious Times: Your Chances of Dying, Raising Another Man's Child, Ingesting Insects

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YOUR CHANCES OF DYING ARE 100 percent

Another reminder that the things we fear will kill us aren't actually likely to do us harm, while the things we enjoy probably will. An article titled "The Six Most Feared But Least Likely Causes of Death" explains that our most common fears are also the most improbable events we will ever encounter. For example, you would have to fly on an airplane every day for 19,000 years before the odds caught up with you and you died in a plane crash. Your odds of being attacked by a shark are one in 11.5 million, being murdered is also exceedingly rare, and dying in a terrorist attack gives you odds of one in 9.3 million. Meanwhile, the leading causes of death include: smoking, drinking, poor diet and physical inactivity, car crashes, illicit drugs and, according to this article, sexual behaviors. (sixwise.com)

SUBTRACT H FOR HAIRINESS AND Z FOR ZITS

And now, from the "Scientists Who Have Too Much Time on Their Hands" department, comes news out of Britain that a psychology professor at Manchester Metropolitan University has devised a mathematical formula designed to rate the perfection of your ass. After researching the booties of 2000 British women, Dr. David Holmes devised the formula (S+C) x (B+F)/T = V, where S is the overall shape of the ass, C represents how spherical the butt cheeks are, B measures muscular wobble or bounce, F measures firmness, V is the hip to waist ratio, and T equals the skin texture and presence of cellulite. In conclusion, Dr. Holmes felt it necessary to tell reporters that, "The perfect female derriere has firmness to the touch and a resilience that prevents undue wobble or bounce, yet looks soft with flawless skin." (Sunday Times)

Arguing WITH YOURSELF

Psychologists claim that people who talk to themselves aren't necessarily losing their grip on reality, and talking to yourself is a healthy way to get through life. However, they also warn that talking to yourself is only beneficial if you say nice things. (New York Times)

WHO'S YOUR DADDY?

Science has finally caught up with the Jerry Springer show with new research that suggests that up to one in 25 fathers are actually raising another man's child. The study, published in the latest issue of the Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health, suggests that the growing reliance on paternity tests will reveal huge numbers of what is technically called "paternal discrepancy." The researchers based their one in 25 figure on statistics that suggest that around one-third of pregnancies are unplanned and one in five women in long-term relationships have affairs. (World-Science.net)

YOUR LIFE for 10 BUCKS

An investigation by a British newspaper found that you can buy the banking details and credit card information of hundreds of thousands of people for about $10 each from call center workers in India. An undercover reporter from The Sun was easily able to find an IT worker in Delhi who sold him the credit card numbers and bank account passwords of 1,000 U.K. banking customers. The call center worker told the journalist that he could sell him the account details of about 200,000 customers per month.

IMPERIALISTS from Space

A British astronomer, Dr. Richard Hall, warns that contact with aliens could prove extremely dangerous for humans, as primitive civilizations (us) that meet with more highly advanced technological civilizations are usually wiped out. In classic British understatement, Hall remarked that attempts to contact civilizations in outer space could prove "horribly counter-productive." (stuff.co.nz)

17 PERCENT PREMENSTRUAL

An emotion-recognition software program developed at the University of Illinois has been used to analyze the enigmatic smile of Leonardo da Vinci's Mona Lisa. According to this program, Mona Lisa's expression was 83 percent happy, 9 percent disgusted, 6 percent fearful and 2 percent angry. (New Scientist)

I-READ-IT-ON-THE-INTERNET-SO-IT-MUST-BE-TRUE FACT OF THE WEEK

The average person ingests one to 2 pounds of flies, maggots and mites each year in their food.

This is the final installment of Curious Times. See Page 9 for more info. Get future updates by joining the e-mail list at curioustimes.com.

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