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CD Review

Superbeautifulmonster: Bif Naked

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We have a lot to thank Canada for musically; the Great White North has sent the world bountiful gifts ranging from Leonard Cohen to k.d. lang, Rush to Neil Young and the list goes on. When it comes to Bif Naked, I hope the gift receipt came with her.

I could lay out in excruciating detail why I found Superbeautifulmonster to be a painful experience: the by-the-numbers songwriting, the pedestrian arrangements, the extra-cheesy riot-grrl posturing. I only have 200 words, though, and why share my pain? I believe it was our very own music editor/prophet who referred to Ms. Naked as a "tattooed Brittany Spears," and a better description of her work here would be hard to find. Thanks, Amy.

Still, I hate to be completely negative. Some good things to say ... well, she's attractive, in a Fairuza Balk kind of way, and the album cover and interior photos make somewhat good use of that. Supposedly, this album was culled from more than 50 tracks, so she gets points for work ethic and ambition. And although I think it's one of Metallica's crappiest songs, she gets points for a faithful cover of "Nothing Else Matters." Faint praise, but it's all I got.

Editor's note: You're welcome, Brandon, but these reviews are actually supposed to be 250-300 words. Just think of all of the nice things you could have said with those extra words.

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